You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize