I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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