LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
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I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
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So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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