Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize