Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Randomize
