I wish I only lived at night.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
