its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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