I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
