o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize