I'm going to rape someone's good day.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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