I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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