someone owes me an orgasm
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
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