awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
