Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I didn't notice because vodka
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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