i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
someone owes me an orgasm
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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