Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
