i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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