I showed him my bush... on skype.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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