Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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