I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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