pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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