He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Randomize
