Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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