I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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