we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
These 23 People Had Sex With Someone From Completely Different Cultures
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset