And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
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they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
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I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start