Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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