im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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