so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
