Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
