Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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