Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I know her cup size but not her name....
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
