i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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