I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
