So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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