There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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