I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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