and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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