It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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