This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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