I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize
