i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Randomize
