The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Don't EVER smell your tampon
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
