Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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