Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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