Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize