wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Randomize
