so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
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