I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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