Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
