yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize